My girlfriend and I had been together for five years. Everything seemed perfect— (Leaving a relationship) we had moved in together, lived happily for two years, and even talked about marriage. There were no warning signs, no hidden truths, nothing that made me question our relationship.
For my birthday, she gave me a smartwatch—a thoughtful present. In return, I went all out for hers: getting everything she loved, taking her on a nice trip, treating her to a fancy dinner, and gifting her a necklace she had been eyeing. Everything seemed ideal.
However, a few weeks later, while organizing our closet, I stumbled upon a hidden card with a note: “Thank you so much for always thinking of me. It means more than you know. Love, James.” Alongside it was a receipt for a flower delivery, dated just before his birthday. James was her ex—the one she always swore was in the past. Naturally, I was furious.
When I confronted her, she admitted that she had been sending him flowers every year since we got together, and in return, he had been sending her gifts on her birthday and other “special occasions.” She insisted it was nothing more than a friendly gesture and only kept it from me because she knew I wouldn’t approve. But if it was so innocent, why hide it?
She called me insecure and accused me of overreacting, but to me, this felt like an emotional betrayal. In the end, I packed my things, walked away, and ended our five-year relationship. Now, I’m being labeled as insecure, but to me, it was the secrecy that broke my trust. If she kept this hidden, what else could she be hiding?
Need couple therapy after leaving a relationship?
It sounds like you’re dealing with a mix of betrayal, secrecy, and gaslighting. You’re not wrong for feeling hurt—trust is the foundation of any relationship, and she knowingly hid something she knew would upset you. That alone shows she understood the implications.
You gave the relationship five years, and if she was maintaining an emotional connection with her ex behind your back, that’s a valid reason to walk away. It’s not just about the gifts; it’s about honesty, boundaries, and respect.
If you feel at peace with your decision and confident in your reasoning, you probably don’t need it any therapy. However, if you’re struggling with lingering emotions, trust issues, or difficulty moving on, therapy (individual or couples) could help you process everything.
You should find marriage counseling near you by searching on google. For example you can write as: “‘marriage counseling near me'” or you can do as “‘relationship counseling near me'”.
You can also find many good online couples therapy specialists out there. Who will definitely give you BetterHelp.
The Topics we discussed in this blog are:
Online relationship therapy | Online Couples therapy | Couple therapy | Marriage counseling | Relationship | Relationship advice | Cheating in a relationship | Couples Counseling and relationship counseling.
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